A reader asks:

I am a highly experienced marketing guy. I’m good at putting together marketing plans but not so good at speaking in front of people. Whenever I speak, my mind fills with hesitation and fear. How can I get rid of this problem?

Public speaking is a great way to market your services. Just by getting up in front of an audience, you set yourself apart as a leader who is confident in your expertise and skill set. Yet public speaking is also a source of fear and anxiety for many, many people.

I can certainly relate. During high school and college, I used to dread giving class presentations. I knew I wasn’t very good at public speaking, and all I wanted to do was get it over with. My nervousness showed through my tendency to speak really fast, use overly large hand gestures, and even pace back and forth. I’d stare out into the audience, and I just knew they thought my presentation was awful. Then, I’d lose track of what I was saying, so I’d try to refocus by reading off my PowerPoint slides. I absolutely hated it, and it seemed the more I had to do it, the worse the experience became. I soon tried everything in my power to avoid it at all costs.

When I started my business, however, I quickly realized that becoming an effective communicator was essential to attracting prospects and managing clients. If I wanted my business to succeed, I’d have to confront my fears. Prospects and clients look for confidence, expertise, and leadership in the partners they hire, and I didn’t exhibit those qualities whenever I gave group presentations.

Getting better at public speaking starts with the decision that you will do whatever it takes to improve. In my case, I took several public speaking classes and even hired a voice coach. It wasn’t an overnight success, but after a lot of practice and listening to feedback, I’m much better – and more comfortable – when speaking in front of an audience.

Improve Your Public Speaking Mindset

The first step to overcoming your fear of public speaking is to put yourself in the right mindset. If you are giving a speech, you want your audience to walk away with some bit of knowledge or benefit they can use to improve their lives. Focus on the takeaway – what’s the one thing you want your audience to remember? Now, realize it’s up to you to communicate that one thing as clearly and effectively as you can. To do that, keep these tips in mind.

• Be confident. Confidence plays a big factor in public speaking. Often, we are our own worst enemy. We have doubts that we don’t know as much as we should, or have the experience that others do, or we question why people would even want to listen to us, or we fear someone will “find out” that we’re not as good as we say. Realize that you are good enough to give a speech and that others do find your opinion and insight valuable.
• Realize your purpose isn’t to win your audience’s approval. One of the biggest fears people have is looking foolish in front of an audience. There will always be people who disagree with you or have other opinions. That’s ok. You don’t have to win over or persuade everyone in your audience to agree with you or become your client.
• Focus on giving value. Instead of seeking your audience’s approval, focus on giving value – whether that’s educating them on a particular subject or motivating them to take action. Focus on one main theme that you want your audience to remember when they leave.
• Realize you don’t need to be perfect to communicate your message. You can make mistakes or even forget entire parts of your talk. In many cases, your audience won’t even notice. They haven’t read your outline. They don’t know what you missed or left out.
• Humility and humor go a long way. If you do make a mistake, be humble or make a joke about it. Laugh at yourself rather than getting flustered or embarrassed.
• Know that you can handle virtually anything. It’s easy to think about all the negatives that could go wrong. It’s extremely unlikely that you’ll have a heart attack or faint. It’s even less likely that everyone in your audience will leave within the first 10 minutes. But if something does go wrong (that isn’t health related), the best way to handle mishaps is to ask for feedback. If people are leaving, stop where you are and ask them what they were hoping to get out of the talk. If someone asks a challenging question, become curious and ask why they think that way. You can learn a lot from your audience by opening up a dialog and soliciting feedback.
• Remember, the audience wants you to succeed. They showed up for your talk, so they were at least mildly interested in your topic. They want to hear your thoughts, opinions, and expertise on the matter.

Techniques For Becoming a Better Presenter

While having a positive mindset toward public speaking will get you pretty far, being prepared and practicing ahead of time will help you be more relaxed. Here are some tips to get started.

• Preparation is the key to feeling comfortable. Learn as much as you can about who you’ll be talking to and what they expect, where your talk will take place, how long it should be, what audio/visual equipment you’ll have, and where you’ll speak in relation to your audience. If you have the chance, talk to your audience beforehand to learn what they hope to learn from the talk.
• Break your talk into three main points. One of the most effective ways to communicate your message is to use the Rule of Three – that is, have three main points and repeat them throughout your talk. Three is a powerful number, especially in storytelling. Movies are broken into three acts. Some of the most famous fables are about the three little pigs, or the Three Musketeers, or Goldilocks and the three bears. And many of the key principles you remember are arranged in threes: “Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness,” “Stop, Look and Listen,” or “I came, I saw, I conquered.”
• Practice. The more you practice your speech, the more comfortable you’ll feel with the material. Try giving your speech aloud in front of a mirror, videotaping yourself, or asking a group of friends to listen. Practice your eye contact and gestures, and ask for feedback on your delivery.
• Breathe. Deep breathing automatically calms us down and focuses us on the present moment. Take a few deep breaths before you start you speech, whenever you realize you’re rushing your material, or after you’ve made a key point.
• Seek audience feedback. While it may seem like you are the center of attention, always keep your audience’s needs in mind. If they are giving you questioning looks, ask if they have questions or need you to clarify something. If their eyes are glazing over and you’re losing their attention, do something unexpected like changing your tone, asking questions, getting them to participate in an activity, or if necessary, taking a break. After the talk, take audience questions, stay afterward to chat, or hand out a questionnaire or rating form to solicit feedback.
• Have a back-up plan. Finally, be sure to have a back-up plan just in case of technical difficulties or the unexpected happens. Dress in layers in case the room temperature is too hot or too cold, and have an outline sheet or index cards handy.

The more time you invest in preparation, the better your speech will be. Practice until you feel comfortable giving your speech. Visualize, beforehand, giving the best speech you can give. And be confident that you have what it takes to stand before an audience and speak effectively.

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